making creative progress with gentle discipline

“Rather than comparing ourselves to others, twisting our own arms, and punishing ourselves with duty and guilt, we need to have a gentle compassion, and a non-judgmental spirit toward our creative work.”  — Pat Schneider

what am i doing wrong?

When you have high expectations of yourself, you might think that if your efforts don’t come easily or produce perfect results quickly, you’re doing something wrong. Many of us dreamers, free spirits and creative, sensitive souls are slow to realize our true potential because we don’t see our abilities and challenges clearly, we don’t have a creative process that we trust, and we don’t know how to manage our emotions.

In Writing Alone and with Others, Pat Schneider teaches, “The roots of a useful discipline lie in understanding ourselves, and that is a gentle matter.” Creative development requires self-compassion. We can’t find long-term, reliable creative flow by working from a place of desperation and force.

Schneider goes on to say, “The wrong kind of discipline damages the creative process. The deepest, truest discipline has its roots in the ancient wisdom of the Hebrew prophet Zechariah: “Not by might, nor by power, but by…spirit.” In the words of Naked Lunch author, William Burroughs, ‘There is no such thing as will power. Only need.’ 

In my workshops and coaching programs, I take my clients through the process of clarifying the authentic needs and intrinsic motivations behind their creative callings. With these needs as a foundation, you can feel safe to experiment and even find pleasure in it, as you discover the creative process that supports you the way you are.

WHAT WORKS FOR ME?

All of us have different patterns, needs, and lifestyles, and we know this, but when it comes to our creative endeavors we often look down on ourselves when our habits and patterns are different from what works for other people. One objective I have for all my clients is that they develop a refreshed outlook on their creative process, one that considers their unique rhythms and needs.

Early on in my writing journey, I thought there were certain indicators of a disciplined writer, and because I didn’t have those same habits — getting up at 5 am everyday, writing 2000 words/day, completing full drafts in one hour, etc. — I struggled with imposter syndrome and self-doubt. I constantly talked myself into and out of my right to call myself a serious writer and this got in the way of me being open to figure out what works for me.  

Many writers I’ve worked with talk about not being disciplined enough, finding it easier to be consistent in other areas of their lives and how frustrating that can be. It makes sense though because with creativity we have to pave our own path to find what works for us which requires a conviction that we have to do self-work to find. 

A creative calling can feel more like a duty or inconvenience without this conviction —the way it calls to you and makes you feel guilty for neglecting it, the way you have to face your insecurities and doubts when you spend time with it. To dissolve this block, think of your creative practice as a reward, not a duty, and find actionable ways to put this reframe into practice.

For example: If you need to practice writing more consistently, you might dread the time you’ve set aside for it because you think you will struggle with your words not being good enough. Instead, make it feel like a reward by creating a cozy environment (favorite drink, candles, whatever vibes you like) and take the pressure off by celebrating yourself for even showing up. Take five minutes to write a brain dump of what is most pressing on your mind. Just five minutes. View it as a break from the movement of your day, and an opportunity to get your thoughts out of your mind and onto paper. That’s it. Do this often enough that you come to look forward to it. After a few sessions, look back and see if you notice any patterns. What seems to be on your mind often? When you’re ready to deepen your practice, you can extend the time to ten minutes, and you can choose one of those patterns you noticed to write about. The key here is to eventually look forward to this time to yourself, and in the process, you are becoming a more consistent creator.

what is my definition of success?

We associate discipline with success but when we visualize success, we often leave the dirty work of discipline out of the vision. We only picture the highlight reel and that's what we expect to experience. If you don't visualize a version of success that includes development and discomfort, when struggles with discipline come along, you might assume they are signs that you won't succeed. You might give up on yourself too easily with an all-or-nothing attitude: 'I suck at discipline, so I’ll never be successful.'

When I started recalling my other passions and accomplishments in life to find the mindset, habits, and resources I relied on to succeed and find fulfillment, I traveled back in my mind and journaled about how I approached dancing, school, work, and other creative endeavors:

What were the circumstances when I was excelling? What were the circumstances when I was feeling most fulfilled in my work or my art? How did I get good grades? How did I get promotions and grow in my roles at work? How did I study? How did I pursue opportunities and prepare myself for them? How did I manage distractions? What was driving me then? What’s driving me now? What do I now know that I didn’t know then? What do I need and value now that I didn’t then? 

Exploring these questions made me realize that when I was my most accomplished it was either because I was enjoying the work and the process I’d created around it, or because I was forcing myself out of sheer will to not fail or disappoint. So the question is, which motivation do I want to tap into now? Do I have some redefining to do? What do I want discipline to feel like? What do I want  my creative process to feel like? Is my idea of success based on the results or the process?

For your own reflection: Think about the mindsets and habits that have brought you success and/or fulfillment in your life and work. Answer the reflection questions above to get insights on how you can use wisdom you already have to develop your current creative process with compassion and self-awareness.

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I offer group and 1:1 experiences to help you understand your creative process and motivation on a deeper level. You can browse below for a few of my current offerings, and you can join my newsletter community for free access to inspiration, resources, and events.